"After the Sam-shaped cartoon puff of smoke has evaporated into the air, Mir describes the rest of her date: they kissed at the door, he declined her invitation to come up to her place, they kissed once more, and he said he'd call. Carrie thinks two kisses is "promising." Char says it shows "respect," and that he wants to take it "slow." Mir asks Berger what he thinks. He pauses and says ominously, "Honestly?" Here we go. Mir says she "wants a man's opinion for a change." Okaaaay. Berger drops it, with no "sugar-coating. He's not that into you." Carrie squeak-gasps, shattering glass throughout the tri-state area. Mir wants more elaboration. Berger says that if the guy was into her, he would have come up. Char screeches, "Don't LISTEN to him!" Carrie says there can be extenuating circumstances, like an early meeting. Char adds that guys don't want to be hurt, and Mir reaches even farther with "sometimes they're freaked out, by their own feelings?" Oh, please. We're talking about men. Feelings are so low on their list of priorities. Berger says that all this is "code for 'he's not that into you.' If he's into you, he's coming upstairs."
Mir lets this sink in. "He's just not that into me!" Sam tells her not to listen to Berger, since he doesn't know what he's talking about. She says to him, sotto voce, "You're fired." Berger tries to backpedal his way out of the canyon by saying, "If the guy's not into you, he's obviously a weenie." True, that. But still. It probably stings a little for Mir. And again -- she's just figuring this out? Has Mir never subscribed to the "get while the getting's good" rule many men (and women) live by? Dude. Mir, finally, says, "I love it! It is the most liberating thing I've ever heard! Think of all the time and money I could have saved in therapy had I known this before!" She didn't know? Oh my. Is this what the show will do in its final season -- drop anvils and S-P-E-L-L dating truisms out for everyone? Oh, right." - from Television Without Pity's 6.4 Sex and the City Recap
Apparently, the writer and consultant for the show came up the idea of a self-help/dating book based on the episode. It's actually one of the most enlightening things I've ever read. I passed it on to Fran, along with Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell, but I think any female would benefit from reading it. I am NOT a fan of self-help books, but this one is funny, and it makes a lot of sense. The only part I don't like: girls are supposed to let the guys do the chasing. That includes letting him ask you out. If I waited for guys to do the asking, I'd never have any dates! But I'm willing to give it a try, for the sake of completely un-scientific curiosity. And I've already found the perfect